Rascal: A Toy Story
By: Chi Chi LaRue
From: Priape
Genre: Fetish/Dildo
While “Woody” and “Buzz” would make excellent nicknames for dildos, this is definitely not the Disney/Pixar flick. Dickney/Prixar maybe...but if you’ve ever wandered through your favourite sex toy store and asked yourself, “what the heck am I supposed to do with that,” then this film may have some answers.
It starts with Blake Riley scouting the shelves and picking up a plastic mould of Drake Riley’s ass. He takes the large toy home and lays beside this creepily realistic looking plaything (as if the rest of Drake were embedded in the mattress thanks to a failed teleportation experiment), fingering it and getting intimate with himself. Reality crosses with fantasy as the actual Drake Riley appears – beside his own ass mould to boot. At a few points Blake apparently becomes disoriented and does things with the plastic ass rather than the real ass right beside it. Gee, I wonder how they compare. It would have been a blast if Drake had decided to pound his own ass though.
The film features Johnny Hazzard, who will be making an appearance at Edmonton’s Pure Pride dance this year June – as an easter egg, the mould of his cock was clearly visible on a shelf in the 1st scene. He appears in the last scene where he catches Rod Daily jerking off to a porno at work. In this case they break into a 3-pack of Rascal dildos – the “Initiation Kit” as it is called. The sizes ramp up from small to large, and he uses each one on his buddy.
Aside from being a big product demo, you’ll enjoy this porno if clean cut 30-somethings are your dirty pleasure.
Service Me
By: Muscle411.com
From: Adult Depot
Genre: Muscle/Amateur
Faves: Maxime FuuQ, Tyler Reed
Good old Tyler Reed, who appeared on our cover for October 2005...apparently wearing the exact same criss-crossing leather harness on the cover of this DVD. I love how polite the question mark is, at the end of “Get On Your Knees For This Big Man?” You mean you have to ask? For old time’s sake I always keep an eye out for Reid’s pornos, even though his early ones are pretty bad – hey, you have to start somewhere! He tells me his latest work is miles ahead but we have yet to see it here in Calgary.
Call Reid self-indulgent, but this porno centres around him, the muscle stud, in a series of encounters with guys who are eager to please his needs. The result is some fairly vanilla sex, unless you count the wearing of jock straps to be particularly kinky.
Reid is a big guy with a moderate build, and the others range from light to moderate. All guys are clean shaven and smooth chested (with the exception of bearded muscle-bear, Maxime Fuuq, and I love him for it). Many of them have tattoos, and jock straps seem to be a recurring theme.
Don’t expect very much more than an amateur film from this early work. The editing is terrible, from cellphones going off, to instructional talk during sex, to sound cutting out during orgasms, to the camera man asking “pause?” when it was time for a fluffer break. But hey, you like what you like – and I certainly liked Maxime Fuuq for his look and puppy-dog enthusiasm.
And if you weren’t gagging enough already, check out the gag reel for a few luke-warm laughs with the boy from scene 4. 