I used
to love Saturday Night Live when I was a kid. By far one of my favorite cast
members was Victoria Jackson. I thought she was hilarious. Granted, she mostly
played the same ditzy blonde character in every skit, but she did it well.
When
Jackson left the show in 1992 I remember feeling disappointed. I was positive
SNL just wouldn't be the same without her. And, of course, it wasn't, but my
allegiance was with the show, not with Jackson. And it wasn't long before I
lost track of her.
Fast
forward almost two decades later. I hadn't even thought of Victoria Jackson in
years. In fact, if you would have asked me if she was even still alive I would
have been unable to answer that question.
But
she's alive all right. And, it turns out, completely insane.
On March
18, "The Muslims next door," a column by Tea Party Princess Jackson,
appeared on World Net Daily, the Internet's go-to source for right-wing ranting
and raving about homosexuality. Granted, Jackson's piece is, as the title
indicates, about Muslims, but she manages to get some anti-gay jabs in there as
well (I suspect that's editorial policy at WND).
"Why
do liberals embrace Islam knowing it frowns on homosexuality?" Jackson
writes. "Because they have the same goals. Progressives, communists,
liberals, globalists and Muslims want to destroy America. When that goal is reached,
they will fight for top billing. It will be bloody."
Ah, yes.
the great race to destroy the country and then beat the shit out of each other.
She's on to us. Granted, I don't know where we're going to live once our shared
dream of destruction is realized. Probably Canada.
I should
point out that Jackson's criteria for "embracing Islam" simply means
the opposite of denouncing Islam. So basically if you don't hate something then
that means you love it. And probably want to gay-marry it. Very logically sound.
And so
her thinking goes throughout her column. It's rambling and full of sweeping
generalizations and unsupported claims. At times she tries to be funny, but
really she just comes across as a hateful person.
"Frankly,
I'm afraid to say anything about Muslims. Why? Because they kill people,"
she writes. "I try to stay away from violence, and I wouldn't even be
thinking about Islam except that they keep jumping in front of my face. No one
talked about Islam when I grew up. How did they all suddenly appear in
America?"
Good
question. How did they "all suddenly appear in America?" Surely there
weren't Muslims here back in the 60s and 70s when Jackson was a kid. I mean,
it's not like Islam is one of the largest religions in the world or anything.
So there's really just no telling how they managed to get some of their people
on U.S. soil right under Jackson's nose.
All
Muslims are up to no good in Jackson's eyes. She writes, "Why can't the
'good, peaceful' Muslims denounce the actions of the 'bad, violent' Muslims?
I'm Baptist, and I denounce the actions of the Westboro Baptist Church. They
are not living the way Jesus taught - but the opposite. Maybe, just maybe the
'good' Muslims approve of what the 'bad' Muslims are doing! Maybe they are
celebrating it, funding it and cheering them on."
It's
strange that Jackson seems to be completely unaware of the multitude of Muslims
who condemn violence. The majority of them, even. Maybe, just maybe she needs
to read something other than World Net Daily. And before we give her too much
credit for denouncing the Westboro Baptist Church, don't forget that she
doesn't like gays one bit. Especially, it seems, not the gleeful ones.
"Did
you see 'Glee' this week?" she writes. "Sickening! And, besides
shoving the gay thing down our throats, they made a mockery of Christians -
again! I wonder what their agenda is? Hey, producers of 'Glee' - what's your
agenda? One-way tolerance?"
Granted,
I don't watch "Glee," but I know that there was a kiss between two
boys on the show. Perhaps, for the sake of "balance," someone should
have beaten the shit out of those two fags on the same episode. You know, a nod
to all of the tender hearted Christians out there offended by a boy kissing
another boy.
Remember,
when you kiss a homo you do it for Satan. But when you sucker punch one, you're
doing it for Jesus.