The Don’t Buy In Project is a diversity and hate-bias program provided by the Calgary Police Service for local junior and senior high schools. This free program delivers the skill development, information and resources needed to support an environment that actively addresses issues of hate, bias and discrimination.

“They did some focus groups with the Diversity Resources Unit with the Calgary Police Service and spoke to a group of youth and assessed where some gaps were and what was needed in the schools and lacking in services. The unit realized we needed an educational program for youth that addresses hate bias crimes and incidents and encourages people to report these crimes. It was at that point that I came on and we developed the program and website. This is the fourth year and the response has been amazing,” Elizabeth Cooke, Project Coordinator, told GayCalgary and Edmonton Magazine.

That Cooke is booked for the entire school year is evidence enough of the project’s success. Aside from its availability to schools, the presentation is also available to community groups and other youth organizations. Cooke said that the support she has received from the Public and Catholic school board, as well as Christian schools, has blown her away.

In addition to race, religion, gender, age and disability, a large component of the program deals with sexual orientation.

“I don’t specifically bring up the term homophobia, but I would say that the education, awareness and discussion that we have around sexual orientation assists with encouraging young people to ask questions and to know there is support out there. I spend a lot of time on that, because it is something that is very prevalent in schools and is very real to the students. The response is really good. I think a lot of times [in] both the Catholic and Public schools there really is no education around it, and kids are curious. They want to know about it, no matter what their sexual orientation is - I feel like a sense of relief. It is the feeling that ‘finally someone is in here talking about it and is comfortable about it. I can ask questions during or after the presentation.’ I also always leave the opportunity for people to e-mail me. It is a very good response and discussion piece.”

It is not easy initially, especially in younger age groups. Bringing up words like ‘gay’ and ‘fag’ can at times lead to giggling.

“We talk about when I use words like Gay, Lesbian, Sexual Orientation, I ask the students ‘why is there laughter? Where do you think it comes from?’ A lot of it is discomfort, lack of education, not knowing a LGBT person; a lot of them refer to their peers, that they laugh. Others say ‘it is a word that is wrong.’ If that is said, we go into that [topic]. I start the presentation by talking about ‘what is diversity’ which means being different. So I ask right at the start ‘How many of you feel it’s ok to be different?’ and everybody raises their hand. So I always come back to that. When they say ‘we’ve been taught that it’s not ok’ and I reply ‘at the beginning you raised your hand and said being different is ok so what makes that not ok?’ They think about it and the light kind of comes on in their head. Once I talk about it, it is amazing to see that halfway through the presentation when I use the terminology or bring up LGBT issues there isn’t the laughter because we’ve been talking about it. I remind them that when I first said the word gay, they all laughed, but by the end of the presentation, they aren’t laughing because they have been educated and informed. You have that knowledge and aren’t wondering because someone came in and talked about it with you.”

Part of the reason why it has become such a vital part of Don’t Buy In is the fact that the term “gay” is tossed around so casually, and in a negative fashion. These days, a bad class is gay, shoes are gay, a band is gay, etc.

“If I go out, it is a struggle even in my age group. I hear people talk like that and I have to say something. One of the things I do with students is go into ways to respond to things like discrimination and situations that are effectively hate incidents, which need to be taken seriously. I think it is higher now, but a few years ago they said approximately 1 in 10 persons identified as LGBT. A lot of students are shocked to hear that. It is one of these awareness things that a lot of young people think it is just a word, a name, and don’t stop to think about who they might be offending more than they might realize.”

Cooke knows her efforts are paying off by the positive reactions from students, especially those who are directly affected, such as LGBT students.

“I had a young person approach me after the presentation and say ‘How do I come out?’ which is like, whoa… that is something we would have to sit down and we could talk about for hours and get into a lot of different details about that. A lot of people approach me after the presentation and many send e-mail. A lot of the high school aged students, because their peers are already aware of their orientation, feel more comfortable with talking about their own experiences. But we do get a lot of e-mails from students saying ‘thank you and coming in and talking about it, because nobody does.’”

Her hope is that the presentation will prevent incidents like suicide and school violence.

“It is very real, which people are starting to realize. When you look at a lot of the school shootings that have happened and the suicides, when we look really deep into why those things took place, a lot of it is from hate incidents and name calling. Regardless of orientation there are people taking their own lives because they are being humiliated every day. A lot of these school shootings have taken place by young people who every day are being called gay and fag and all these other things, and many of them are not even gay. Regardless of if they are or not, no one deserves to be treated this way.”

To do this, Cooke uses real examples.

“I met the mother of a heterosexual [boy] in BC who committed suicide. He was 14 or 15 and because he was on the honor role, didn’t drink or do drugs, hung out with girls and dressed nice, the people at school just made his life a living hell everyday, to the point he couldn’t take it anymore. I share some real stories with the youth about how words really do impact people more then they know. When something like this happens, it is too late, you can’t take those words back.”

With four years of success, Cooke’s goal is to create a program for elementary school students in grades 5 and 6. She firmly believes that by getting to people young, the program can help prevent bullying throughout the school system and into adulthood. From there, we can only hope her message spreads farther than Calgary.

“One thing we, as a city, should feel pretty proud of is that we are the only city in Canada that has a program like this. We definitely started this off and my goal now is to get this program in every police organization across the country and have the message in every school.”

Don’t Buy In

Elizabeth Cooke, Project Coordinator

(403) 206-8162

www.dontbuyin.ca